Perfectly Imperfect
by Roarax
Summary: Ivy/Rachel: femslash - Rachel isn't too certain on how to proceed after a love declaration.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own these characters. They belong to KH.

"_I love you too._" Ivy had whispered the words, moisture shimmering in her chocolate gaze. She had hugged me tight and almost crushed me. "_God, Rachel, I love you so much._"

The vampire had shaken off each of my attempts at apology—as I tried without avail to explain the reasons it had taken me so long to blurt the words out. "_I was afraid, Ivy. After all this time I didn't know if you'd reject or embrace me. And I get that's it's hypocritical and everything; that for me to say that rejection was the thing that held me back when all I wanted to do was tell you tha—_"

She had then placed a single finger upon my lips, shushing and arousing me at the same time. My coherent thoughts had been engulfed by the never-ending mantra of her name as she'd pressed her lips to mine. My palms had begun to sweat; mind registering the fact that the vampire wouldn't enjoy bodily fluids smeared across her cheeks if I'd decided to reach up and cup her face. Well…not _those_ corporal juices, anyway. So, I'd kept my hands at my sides, flexing my fingers as Ivy's mouth had worked wonders on mine.

"_Rachel._" I remember the way she'd breathed my name, hands entangled in my untameable curls. Her tongue had traced the contour of my quivering lips with what some would call expertise, and I'd become self-conscious of the placement of my own tongue—clueless as to how to move it to create the same tingling sensations hers had been evoking within me. "_I want you so much._"

She'd whispered the words against my lips prior to slipping a hand beneath my shirt, running the tips of her fingers across the sensitive flesh of my stomach. I'd felt my body spasm beneath her when I forgot how to breathe, too focused on the delicious reactions her touch elicited from me. Coughing into my new and first girlfriend's mouth had not been the greatest course of action to debut a perfect relationship. I remember being able to see my reflection in the black of her eyes when she'd pulled away: eyes wide, lips parted, still as a statue. She'd chuckled, kissing my forehead and telling me once again just how much she adored me in the softest of tones. God, she was beautiful. Flawless.

My heart had begun to thunder against my chest cavity when I realized that there was no way I could compare to her beauty or skill. I'd taken a shower the night before, so body odour had been the first element to be crossed off of my anxiety list. The second had been privacy—Jenks had been respectful enough to leave with his brood the moment he'd heard me speaking to Ivy with a serious note in my tone. Third had been comfort; not my own but Ivy's. She'd been on top of me, one hand draped over the back of the couch to anchor herself to me and the other resting on my small breast. One of my legs had fallen between the cushion and the couch, leaving me to fidget when I felt left-over crumbs lodge themselves between by toes.

By then, I was still clueless as to where to place my sweaty hands, but they hadn't been my only problem at that point. The treacherous salt liquid had decided to begin to leak from every one of my pores by that point in time, sticking the material of my clothes to my damp skin. To top everything off with a cherry, I'd had to pee.

"_Ivy…_" I'd arched my back into her touch when she'd begun kneading my nipple with her index and thumb through the fabric of my shirt, determined on staying concentrated upon what was left of the coherency swimming through my mind. And even then, what little intelligibility I had left was pretty much: _Sex. With Ivy. Oh, sweet Jesus._

"_More?_" The vampire had offered.

And that single word had made me realize just how much I _wasn't_ ready for more. Lord knew how much I'd wanted to proceed, but my mind was racing with scenarios, possible outcomes, and paths of action to take. How could I please Ivy when she was akin to the Goddess of Sex? How was I supposed to know which methods to take to turn her lady parts on? And how, by the Turn, could I know if she'd even like seeing me naked?

The last enquiry I'd asked myself had been the one to trigger every alarm in my body. Something I'd forgotten. Something that, if not fixed within the next few minutes, might have made a difference between Ivy regarding me as a child and an adult…

So here I was. In the shower, moments after I'd told the vampire with an awkward expression on my visage that I'd needed to "_freshen up._" I'd been rushing to finish up as fast I could, which was the reason I was now standing against the tiled wall, holding a wet cloth to my stinging mound. The water was still running, turning cold with a slowness that one could only define as taunting. Perfect—even the liquid pouring from the showerhead was laughing at me.

I heard a knock on the door. "Rachel? Are you almost done?"

"Yeah, just give me a minute."

There was a pause. Then, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Just…give me a minute."

I rolled my eyes, congratulating myself for the brilliant second response to Ivy's different question. Now, she'd _really_ think something was wrong. I shut my eyes, throwing my head back against the wall to thunk it once, twice, thrice against the tiles. Why did sex have to be so complicated? I looked down, removing the cloth an inch to see if it was still pretty bad. It was.

Blood pushed through the five thin slits of skin that had been sliced open during my rushed state, pouring down both sides and between my thighs. The stinging hadn't dissipated over the course of time as I thought it would have; cursing in a shushed tone, I pressed the damp cloth once again over the bleeding expanse of flesh. This was not going as I'd hoped. Even if I did manage to get the bleeding to stop before leaving the bathroom, the vampire would notice the diagonal gash marring the otherwise unblemished skin. Why, why, why did sex have to be so _complicated?_ I pressed my palm harder against the cloth, eliciting a harsher sting from the self-inflicted wound but with luck decreasing the length of my bleeding episode.

"Dear heart?" Ivy's voice resonated with clarity throughout the confines of the bathroom, and it was only after a few seconds of paralyzed shock that I realized the vampire had opened the door. "If you don't want to do this anymore, it's fine. I get that you need time—I'm sorry if I rushed you."

"No!" I gasped, smacking my free hand against the fogged glass door and waving to remove the humidity as if my life depended on it. "Don't leave. I still want to do this."

Her face lit up like a child's on Christmas morning and I would have thrust the door open to pull her into an embrace, naked and wet, if my groin hadn't been stinging and bleeding. Goddammit, this was so unfair. As if unsure what to do, Ivy opened the bathroom door the rest of the way and stepped inside with hesitation. She had changed into a white, revealing blouse and a pair of tight black jeans. I was willing to bet she'd put that specific outfit on because she'd seen me ogling her multiple times in the past when she'd been wearing that exact set of clothes. She'd been right, as always—that set of garments looked exquisite on her: exposing and yet leaving plenty to the imagination. Anticipation was apparent upon her adorable expression; the way she'd clasped her hands together at her front, cracking her knuckles and approaching the shower door with slow steps made me hate the way events had turned out because of my brainless decisions.

"Can I come in?" She asked with a smile, tracing the contours of my face on the glass with the tip of her index finger.

_God, please do._ "Umm…"

Once again, hope melted from her chocolate gaze as she registered my embarrassment as uncertainty. The finger tracing the distant lines of my visage trailed lower before falling in proportional disappointment to her expression. I stumbled backwards, feeling the passage of that finger through the valley between my breasts as it dropped away from my face and revelling in the sensations imagination could offer. It was all I could do not to clutch onto the shower head for support. The hurt in Ivy's eyes was almost too much to bear, and my heart clenched with repressed emotion at the sight of her regret.

"Ivy…" I began, not knowing how to proceed. What was I supposed to tell her? _I wanted to be perfect for you. I didn't want you to see me with flaws that you lacked. I ended up hurting myself with the simplest of tools because I'm just that stupid._ "Don't go."

It was all I could think up on the spot, and my subconscious mind smacked me because of it. Her expression contorted from hurt to confusion, the new emotion marking her brow in the cutest of ways. "I don't understand, Rachel. Do you…want me?"

"Yes." There was no hesitation in my words. I pressed my forehead against the glass and closed my eyes. "God, Ivy. I've wanted you ever since I met you—I've just been too chicken shit to do anything about it. I'm just really, really stupid sometimes, and you're going to have to learn to cope with the naïve and immature part of me if you want to spend time with the leather-clad, badass Rachel Morgan as well."

The vampire chuckled, which in turn made me grin. I loved to hear the sound of her amusement, even more so when I was the direct cause of its existence. I looked up and was greeted with glistening chocolate irises, full lashes, and sculpted eyebrows. Ivy Tamwood was perfection incarnate.

"What did you do this time, dear heart?" Now _this_ was the woman I knew and loved.

"Nothing." Without deliberation, my thoughts and words shifted to a defensive state. My mind was racing to find and analyze all of the different possible routes when it came down to explaining just how far my lack of common sense had gone this time. "I didn't do anything bad. It's just…well, despite how riled up either of us has become—and God only knows just how bad my condition is at the moment—we just might have to put this off for a while. See, the thing is that I've never really _done it_ with a girl before. And I mean…it's cool. I'm totally into the whole lady parts thing. But like…I'm assuming that being with a woman involves different implications than bring with a dude—you know, without the whole penis thing. Once again, which is cool…"

"Rachel." Ivy stopped my rambling, the corners of her lips twitching in a smile. "What is it you're trying to tell me?"

I took in a deep breath, not quite sure on the exact words to utilize. "So I wasn't sure what methods would be, uhh…well I kinda figured that since we wouldn't be…you know. With the whole…" I made a crude penetration gesture with my free hand to send Ivy into a fit of laughter before she regained a composed stance and expression, giving me a nod that implied: _proceed._ Another deep breath. "I figured that the fact that we'd be using hands and maybe, umm…tongue, it'd only be logical to think of hygiene in the—you know…"

Ivy looked confused beyond belief at this point, and she gave me a shrug of her shoulders as a response.

"The…shaving department." I finished, expecting her to scold me for being irrational and irresponsible.

"Rachel…have you ever shaved your pubic area before?"

I swallowed and shook my head.

A side of the vampire's lips twitched, and she sauntered to the door of the shower; so close I could see the tip of her nose press against the glass. "My silly, silly witch." From where she was standing, it was only a matter of letting her gaze drop to be able to see my entire naked form. However, Ivy's eyes never left my own, their cores exuding an aura of tranquility and happiness as she smiled so that her lips could match the emotion pouring from her irises. "Can I come in?"

A sheepish grin made its way upon my features, and I nodded with visible embarrassment. To my surprise, when Ivy opened the door, the first thing she did—before even taking a peek at my naked figure—was shut the water off. Clothed, the vampire stepped into the showering area with me and took my hips in her hands.

"Kiss me?" Her hushed voice was strained in a way that I couldn't describe, but instead of analyzing the different reasons my vampire's larynx was functioning another way than I was used to hearing, I complied with her request.

Ivy pulled me closer in an embrace while our lips were fused with one another's, my naked chest soaking the material of her shirt as soon as our bodies collided. She treated me no different now than how she would if we'd both been clothed and dry, making me appreciate the woman that much more. As long as I was in her arms, willing to accept and release as much emotion as either of us could contain, nothing else mattered. Her hands clutched my waist tight before reaching around to place themselves with gentle ease over the responsive flesh on the small of my back. Having Ivy touch my skin with no barriers of clothing between her fingertips and my heated tissue was something that made me forget about the sweetness of the implications of her actions in haste.

I forgot about the cloth I'd been holding against my mound, letting it fall to the wet ground with a slosh as I used my newfound freedom to wrap my arms around the slender vampire's neck. I was the one to deepen the kiss, my tongue delving between her plump lips to meet a soft and inviting area. I felt the tips of her canines graze the sensitive tissue of my tongue, and I shuddered as mere imagination managed to spike my arousal.

My breath hitched when Ivy pushed me against the wall of the shower without warning, thrusting her pelvis into my stinging crotch. She emitted a growl of dissatisfaction, and pulled away with haste. "Jesus Christ, sorry. I didn't mean to—wow, that's never happened to me before. I'm sorry."

Her dilated pupils grazed down my nude body to stop at the core of my waist, eyes going wide as she registered the reason she'd reacted with such intensity. I looked down myself, not surprised to see that a fresh trail of crimson liquid had thought it the opportune moment to begin a new journey down the insides of my thighs. The blood swirled with unexpected intrigue on the ground, whirling around the drain to be consumed by the conduit. The cloth was strewn against one of the corners, crimpled in a disorganized ball and forgotten. I pictured myself reaching down and grabbing it, to once again use the material to stop the embarrassing flow of bodily fluids—but with Ivy's proximity and my well-known clumsiness, I was certain our heads would clash if I so much as even tried.

"Rachel." Ivy breathed my name, and my train of thought was at once obstructed by the melodious sound of her voice. "Why did you do this?"

I shrugged, feeling like an utter dumbass. "I thought it was what you'd want."

"You didn't ask me." Her tone wasn't far from the one a mother would utilize with a disobedient child. "You should have asked me. I would have told you that it didn't change anything in the slightest. You're beautiful."

I had to admit, Ivy was quick to pick up on the discomfort I had with being naked.

"_You're _beautiful," I countered. "I'm…average. It's still hard for me to figure out why you're with me when you could so easily get any guy or gal you desired. You're one of the living vamps with the most power in Cincinnati, not to mention your pockets are stacked with cash. And I mean _look at you_."

I laughed a nervous chuckle, urging the vampire to take a gander at her gorgeous, feminine body. The fact that her white blouse was soaked didn't help my resolve one bit; her black lace bra quite visible through the thin and sopping material of her top. She'd worn a black bra underneath a white blouse? Come on—the vampire was without a doubt using her garments as a magnet to my credulous arousal.

Ivy sighed, coming closer to cup my cheek in the hollow of her hand. I turned and kissed her palm, making her eyes close and eliciting a breathy moan from the bottom of her lungs. She used her free hand to turn the knob of the shower, soaking us both.

"Dear heart…" Ivy's voice was but a whisper, only just audible because of the racing water. "You underestimate the power of true beauty. Don't for a minute think that I look at you and see an _average_ woman."

Her pupils undulated with supernatural ethereal before falling back into their usual state. Only then did I grasp the reason the vampire had turned the shower on: to be able to speak to me without being consumed by the raging blood lust that gnawed at the ligaments beneath her flesh. Her tone was much more peaceful, controlled, now that she was able to look me in the eyes without being distracted by the unfortunate turnout of events that had lead to my bleeding crotch. _Jesus, Rachel. You're so goddamn stupid._

Her other hand crept up to cup my opposite cheek, palms holding my face within their grasp and creating an enclosure around my visage that screamed safety and affection.

"I love you," I said, for the second time that evening, pressing my lips to hers. "You're my everything. The only thing I regret is not having realized it any sooner than I did. Ivy, you make me feel like so much more than I am. Thank you."

"Beauty in the flesh." She whispered the words against my lips. "Don't ever think otherwise."

The barest of contact between our lips was enough to send tingling sensations racing through my core, and I felt the back of my eyes begin to sting with repressed tears as those vibrations mingled with the sweet words she'd been uttering. Thankful for the water showering both of our faces, I pulled her into another kiss. The vampire was now as wet as I was; beautiful dark hair matted to her gorgeous face. My hands found their way underneath the sopping material of her blouse, fumbling at clasp of her black bra. As soon as the vampire registered the intentions behind my movements, she inhaled a sharp breath and pulled away.

"Rachel, you're forcing my resolve to slip away." She warned me in a serious tone, though her eyes twinkled with pure feminine amusement. "I want to cherish you, lather you in attention, force you to realize to what extent your body drives me insane. My greatest desire is to crumble at your feet, on my knees, and worship you as the Goddess you are. If you push me too hard, I'll lose control and ravage you from head to toe."

I shrugged with a small smile. "That doesn't sound too bad."

"Rachel…" she warned me again.

I wrapped my hands around her waist and pulled her closer to me without thinking—my intent upon crushing her mouth to mine in a kiss. Instead, our foreheads smashed together because of my unexpected, hasty movement. Ivy recovered with more rapidity than I did, rubbing her sore forehead and chuckling a throaty chortle.

_Smooth_, I thought to myself. _Very nice._

With caution this time, I tried slipping my hands once again underneath her top to feel the delicious expanse of bare flesh that greeted me. After fumbling with the blasphemous hooks for a short while longer, I unclasped her bra and was rewarded with a primal rumble from the bottom of my favourite vampire's throat.

Before I could even smile and answer her animalistic growl with a smug retort, my back was thrust with painful force against the tiles on the wall, and her clothed form was pressed up against mine. My nails dug into her bare back, beneath the material of her blouse, and I whimpered when she dug her face in the crook between my shoulder and neck. Her lips and the peak of her tongue teased the sensitive tissue that had once been ravaged by Al; Ivy turning the disgusting incident into something beautiful. I tried to accentuate the waves of pleasure the vampire was pushing throughout my body with the feel of soft, inviting skin beneath my finger tips, but Ivy quickly had my wrists in one hand and pinned above my head.

I writhed against her, determined to send her tumbling over the edge of self-control.

"I cautioned you, dear heart." Ivy's tone was low, menacing. "I _told_ you to calm down. I _informed_ you that I wouldn't be able to stop myself from desolating your striking body with restraint if you shoved me off of the edge. I _advised_ otherwise…didn't I, Rachel?"

All that I was able to emit was a whimper.

"_Didn't I, Rachel?_" She pressed into me, pelvis rubbing with painful friction against the sliced flesh of my mound. Her tone had altered from a playful threat to a domineering hostility as she repeated the question I'd been asked.

"Yes." I gasped. "Yes, you did. I didn't care—I don't care. I want you."

"Mmm…" Ivy moaned against my skin, her throaty hum reverberating against the tissue and making me shudder. "You're quite the charmer when you can only speak essential words. Did you know that?"

"No." I whispered the word in a shallow exhale, the sensations her pheromones were having upon me being too great to ignore.

The pleasure sliced through my resolve, and if the vampire hadn't been holding me up against the wall with the weight of her body, I'm certain I would have crumbled to the ground. The water from the showerhead thundered against my exposed shoulders to trickle between my breasts and tease the hardened nipples when they weren't pressed against Ivy. The glimpses I was able to catch of the vampire were more than enough to ensure the fact that I wasn't the only happy one here. Her eyes were swirling with an infinite darkness—a black that I would have defined as predatory and menacing before, but was now comprehensive enough to define as predatory and warm, affectionate, protective.

"Now then, let's determine the pros and cons of your irrationality. Shall we?" She pressed her lips to mine in a firm kiss. Ivy was in control, pulling away before crushing my mouth in another searing kiss moments proceeding the first. I let myself go limp, revelling and basking in the attention Ivy was offering. She captured my bottom lip in her teeth and pulled away with it; my heart melted with disappointment when she let it fall back into place. Her teeth were clenched, eyes closed, as she whispered against my parted lips. "Stay."

As if unsure whether I'd obey or not, she trailed her hands down—away from my wrists—and squeezed every expanse of flesh available as she passed, as if to mark her territory. I felt the strong yet gentle tips of her fingers push into my tingling skin as she grazed my biceps, shoulders, breasts, abdominals, and at last waist. Her fingers dug into my hips, finding the area as an adequate using to anchor their nails into. Perhaps the most convenient location to ensure my body remain still while she performed certain actions to make me buck without reprimand? I shuddered at the mere thought of it. The water from the shower was pouring with freedom against my exposed chest at this point, my hands still held with obedience above my head; one wrist clasped between fingers.

Ivy blew with an infinite softness upon the cuts that I'd inflicted upon myself without concrete intention; combined with the heady rush of pheromones swirling around me, my knees gave way and I crumbled under the pleasure Ivy was teasing me with. Due to the vampire not expecting my limited physiological capacities to put out, she emitted a surprised gasp as my knees fell against her shoulders, pushing her backwards as I fell. We fell out of the designated shower area; Ivy on her back with me straddling her…neck. Because of the reasons we'd fallen, my knees were now placed on either side of her face, mound pressed against the hollow of her throat.

"Interesting," Ivy noted with somewhat of a smile upon her delicate features.

"Indeed." I agreed with an embarrassed haste, starting to rise off of the—all of a sudden—very roused vampire.

"Wait."

She placed a hand overtop my navel; the birth scar held below the direct center of her palm. For some reason, this made me stop. The location wasn't that close to any of my tingling areas, and yet that single hand at that single spot felt like one of the most intimate touches I'd ever received.

"Stay," she begged. "Please."

She'd utilized the same term uttered a few moments ago, except this time I detected genuine emotion in her tone, and not just an outer layer of lust clouding her coherency. With reluctant ease, I lowered myself back onto Ivy's throat—the cheeks of my ass resting against her chest cavity.

"Comfortable?" I asked her with a mocking hint to my tone, though a genuine worry for her comfort troubled me.

"Very…" Her voice was distant, eyes glued downwards to stare at the cuts that were still bleeding with generosity. Her fingers traced invisible, intricate patterns on my bare hips, and my lower body clenched in anticipation as imagination got the better of me and I skimmed through the multiple possible outcomes of this situation. Ivy felt my body react, scented my growing arousal, and her chest rumbled beneath me in a purr of content.

The pheromones she'd been releasing had diminished in concentration over the course of time, the vampire managing to get a grasp on her instincts. She sat beneath me, staring at the five thin slits of broken flesh with an intensity that appeared crucial for many moments. I remained silent, waiting for her to move. She didn't. All she did was ogle my core, eyes glistening with a fine sheen of natural moisture that gave her an allure of genuine beauty.

Ivy whispered my name, and that simple utterance sent my heart racing.

"Yes?"

Her enticing tongue peaked out to moisten her lips. "How much do you want this?"

"Almost as much as I want you," I husked, stretching down with an awkward clumsiness and kissing her luscious lips that were just begging to be devoured. "I'm sorry I couldn't make this first time like the movies and books—things are harder to make appear flawless when you're sitting in the middle of it."

"Don't apologize, dear heart." Her gaze was never ripped from my core as we spoke. "Do you…give this to me?"

My breathing accelerated, and I nodded. She didn't budge, eyes fixed upon the blood that had trickled down my legs and onto her neck. The bleeding had ceased for the most part, though I was certain the odour of my fluids were still fresh enough to drive the vampire insane with hunger. Ivy needed a concrete answer, I realized, before she'd even make a move closer to me.

"Yes, I do. Please…"

As if I'd uttered the magic words, Ivy's hands begun to roam my body, rising the length of my back and cupping the nape of my neck. She sat up, holding my neck in the secure strength of her hands as she laid me back onto the shower tiles; the mechanism still running. Water poured over my neck and bare breasts, reviving sensitive areas and discovering new ones. I moaned in dissatisfaction when she reached higher to turn the knob, shutting the flow to leave my chest heaving with the loss of liquid contact. She repositioned us, my back against the cold tile and my legs bent at the knee, hooked on either side of Ivy's shoulders. She was staring straight into my core, eyes hungry and breath hitching with audible difference.

"I can have." She mumbled the words to herself, a smile spreading across her features. "This is mine."

"All yours," I confirmed, squirming atop the vampire to beckon her instincts to surface.

A wash of new pheromones coated the exterior of my flesh, sinking in deep to root themselves to my internal organs. My lungs appeared to decrease in size, shallow pants and exhales replacing my regular breathing. My heart thundered against my breast—its audibility only exciting me further. My veins had become a racetrack: adrenaline zinging through their passages to attain whichever destination was nearest. My mind swirled with incoherencies, Ivy Tamwood being the only thing anchoring my body and soul to this world.

The vampire inched closer, and used the flat of her tongue to lap up the blood stinging my mound. At first, my nerves registered Ivy's actions as painful, throbbing. But that same throb of discomfort was altered with rapidity into a pulsating pleasure, alive and thumping against the outer layer of my skin.

Like a starved kitten, her tongue licked at my wound time and time again, gurgling noises erupting from the hollow of her throat once in a while. She followed the trail of blood with her lips and tongue, travelling down the inside of my thigh to clean up the mess I'd created without intention. All the while, I bucked against her and groaned as the pleasure from the pheromones coated my nerves with the illusion of thrill.

When she was finished lapping the crimson liquid from my parted thighs, she readjusted my legs on her shoulders so that she wasn't allotted that much space this time. Not that she needed it, however. Her lips were inches from my nether ones, curved into a sensuous smile that just about made my head implode. She brought her mouth to my lips in a silent kiss—well, silent up until the point where I screamed for her to "_fuck me already!_" All she had done was emit a low chuckle, though, and continued on with her methodical lavishing of my nether regions.

The pheromones she was releasing made my head swim with bliss, and it was this aspect in particular—combined with the leisured technique of Ivy's tongue running up the length of my slit until her mouth closed over the sensitive bundle of nerves held there—that made my body burst into the most intense orgasm I'd ever experienced. She held me as I shook with the tremors she'd caused; kissed every possible expanse of flesh available, before reaching higher to plant a kiss on my lips.

"Mmm…" She moaned as soon as we parted, the tissue of her lips still caressing mine with the softest of hums as she whispered: "Perfect."

End.


End file.
